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Sarah,

I am guessing that you probably have not gone through infertility. Your question is insensitive. You cannot possibly know how it feels until you have gone through it. Infertility is a very emotional thing to go through and I think that you are not able to understand how we feel.

Sarah,
Read the Bible, it if full of woman who were infertile and cried out to God to give them children (eg, Hannah). Grieiving to have children is a part of the female nature that God has put in every woman and it is a beautiful thing...such is adoption. Children who are given up for adoption are "extra special" and should but should not becompared to a woman who wants a child of her own. Anyway, I am not here to preach, my point is that it is normal for women who are barren to be in anguish about not being able to have a baby.

I understand they can be in anguish.
So why don't they pray for a baby instead of taking out a second mortgage to pay for fertility treatments if they are religious.
Or if they are not religious go by what they must believe in, evolution, survival of the fittest.
Obviously God didn't want it or they were not the fittest.
Why fight God's plan or nature.
I think it just becomes an obsession.

OMG!! Sarah you clearly have NO CLUE as to what it is like to face infertility. First of all it is NONE of your business what people take out 2nd mortgages for. If people want to spend thousands of $$$ fighting to have a baby of their own, than that is their GOD GIVEN RIGHT! They have earned thier $$ and it is not your place to judge how they choose spend it! You have NO right to judge. Secondly... Shame on you for making such a statements as "Obviously God didn't want it or they were not the fittest." & "Why fight God's plan or nature." Who are you to judge!? You seriously need to be educated on this subject before you post.

Sarah, if you're going to make statements like "Obviously God didn't want it or they were not the fittest" you then imply that God has a plan, correct? Well then, using that logic, God had a plan for the nice people who created the fertility drugs and treatments and a plan for the people that use them. So then, technically, the people using the treatments wouldn't be fighting God's plan at all, rather, they would be fulfilling it. And before you start going on about how it's "unnatural" think about any type of prescription or surgery - from asprin to penicillin and from mole removal to lyposuction - are those "natural"? I think suffice to say that we leave well enough alone by not having any more nonsense comments about why God made some people infertile and some not, wish everybody luck (BIG TIME!!!) and use this message board for help, advice and reassurance!

GOOD LUCK ALL!!!

Amen!!!!

Sarah. If that was the case why do people go to hospital to have their appendix out, have heart operations, have Chemo, etc. in order to save their lives - should they just stay at home and die because that is what god planned for them! I dont think so!

Here's my question to you? Why are you on this site? Since you don't have any problems with ttc then you shouldn't be posting suggestions for those of us who are having issues or recent m/c's and need to discuss them with those who understand because they are facing the same dilemnas... there is nothing more beautiful than to feel breast pain, nausea, constipation, frequent urination and ultimately the fluttering of a child in ones womb, how else can I explain it? By the way, I plan on adopting as well but would still like to have one of my own so I'll spend whatever it takes until I've absolutely exhausted every measure, but thank you for caring about my pockets. May you never have to face the anguish of ttc and not succeeding you silly girl. Good luck to all of you who have helped me and supported me throughout these trying months and baby dust to you all!!!!

You are an insensitive bitch.

I wonder if Sarah is honestly trying to start an arugment on this issue. Otherwords, why on earth would you seek out an infertility message board to post something so insensitive? People come to places like this because they need the reassurance and kind words of others who are going through the same thing. They also would like questions answerd by people who have 'been there and done that'. As for nature's will or God's will ... women were made to bear children. All women. That's why we were given the parts and not men! Maybe you (Sarah) should finde the message boards for insensitive bitches!

Please get off this site! You are quite insensitive ... wanting a child is not a selfish thing to do...it's called self fullfilment!